Dealing with kids when dating again after spouse dies

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It had been 11 years since I had been with anyone other than my husband.

I took the year after his death to learn how to deal with being thrown into the full-time roles of parent, homemaker, animal caregiver, appointment scheduler, and child activity manager, as well as the sole financial provider.

Dating too soon after this type of loss is a recipe for disaster, notes Schwartz.

If the partnership ended in abandonment, you may also fear getting close to someone new.

I really didn't want to go this route, but it seemed like the right thing to do to meet people in my age bracket.

Losing a partner to divorce can be just as traumatic as losing someone to death -- without the same level of support from family and friends.

Make your emotional stability priority -- over and above any new dating opportunities.

As widower Abel Keogh notes in the article, "Ten Dating Tips for Widows and Widowers," new love interests in your life "shouldn't have to compete against a ghost." The dangers of dating too soon after the loss of a spouse include not having grieved properly, making comparisons, and coping with judgment from family and friends.

If the loss of a spouse is due to divorce rather than death, there can be the added dimension of bitterness and emotional turmoil caused by the breakup of the relationship.

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