Dating men shorter than you
Check out this equation: Dating Short Men = Uphill Battle. I haven’t conducted a study of my own on the subject, but I can assure you that scores of women of every type will say they simply aren’t attracted to short men.Decoded, this equation refers to the tough time many short men have trying to find a romantic partner because some women won’t date someone shorter than they are. If you push them, they will hedge a bit: “I don’t know why, I’m just not.” As a psychologist, it’s not my job or place to be mean-spirited or hurtfully blunt, but it is my job to tell it like it is in reality.Yeah, I don't get the judgement over a few fucking inches. When I met him, I thought to myself that he wasn't really my physical "type" - I had always dated taller men (a challenge, being a taller-than-average woman) - and then I thought "Well, it would be really shitty to pass up a great guy because of something as insignificant as height." So I went for it, we moved in together after three months, married four years later, and four years after that, we're expecting our first baby. I still wear heels no problem, though I do catch myself slouching down into one hip to be his height in pictures, which is a dumb habit of mine.How the hell could anyone think that makes the tiniest difference when the man I married is a giant where it matters? One short man told us that we were amazing and gave him so much hope when we were walking down the street holding hands, which was weird and adorable. My husband is 3" shorter than me and wasn't really my physical type either. He has never had a problem with it, but I use to be so self conscious.But he's such an amazing man, the difference doesn't bother me. It's so much easier to kiss and cuddle a guy (nearly) the same size, instead of one that towers over you. It wasn't something I cared about in the least, but I'd be lying if I said others didn't make it a big deal. It was fucking irritating and I don't get why it freaking matters at all. We sit on a couch he puts his head on my shoulder, we cuddle I scoot down in the bed so we are at the same height. Other guys have brought it up in the process of hitting on me, like "don't you want a real man" and girls have said no guy wants a girl taller than him or "I'm the perfect height, being tall would be so awkward sexually". It's sort of always in the back of my mind about how weird we must look. I have three brothers who are all 6 5 or taller, so I think that's why I like short brown boys ;)Ask Women: A subreddit dedicated to asking women questions about their thoughts, lives, and experiences; providing a place where all women can comfortably and candidly share their responses in a non-judgmental space.I dated a guy who was 5'4'' and another who was 5'5'' like me, but I'm a regular heel wearer. As part of our commitment to that mission, the Ask Women subreddit is curated to promote respectful and on-topic discussions, and not serve as a debate subreddit.At this point, it’s important to focus less on physical characteristics in order to pay more attention to who is going to be a good catch emotionally – and who will last over the long haul.
Men and women both fall prey to the (remarkably persistent) myth that sexual attraction works on auto-pilot, as if we are all preprogrammed to be attracted to the ones who captivate our attention. The type of person you’re attracted to depends largely on your beliefs. My client, Alexis, comes from the most machismo family I can imagine, full of firefighters, Marines, and gobs of Old Spice. In Alexis’ family, she was the only daughter and the men in her family were brawny and tough.
As a friend of my grandfather once said, there's more than one way to stand tall. He's the type to give you the shirt off his back and shrug it off as nothing when you try to thank him.
He overcame growing up in destitution, danger, and abuse to become a surprisingly well adjusted and empathetic man.
She is one of my clients who has never dated a short man, and she has no intention to ever date one.
She insists, “I’m just not attracted to them.” Alexis is a smart woman, and she is also a nice person, even though her attitudes about short men are actually pretty patronizing and dismissive.